DAY 8 (Mike's Journal)

Mike's Journal
DAY 8

DATE: Wednesday, August 29, 2012
TIME: 9:19pm

A. OPENING THOUGHTS/OBSERVATIONS:

My physical exercise is getting easier and I’m no where near as sore.

Considering this moment in the Hero’s Journey is considered the “Supernatural Aid”, I reflect on the old movie Clash of the Titans. In that version of the Greek myth the hero, Perseus, is given three gifts by his father Zeus, king of the gods: A sword, shield, and helmet. So I’m reflecting on forming talismans, or symbols, to represent my four intentions. For example, becoming a new person is represented by the Yellow Brick Road, a path home to my true self devoid of ego. Becoming smarter, as represented by developing the content for this book, could be represented by the Scarecrow wearing a cone shaped hat. A rich spiritual life, or a greater capacity to love, could be represented by the heart of the Tin Man. Increased confidence could be represented by a medal worn by the Cowardly Lion.

As I continue through my Course in Miracles studies, I cultivate the idea of the separation between God and Man never occurring. Therefore it is appropriate to “think like God” because there is no difference between taking responsibility, for example, of a lucid dream and taking responsibility for forgiveness in the waking world. There is only one mind - that of God. Therefore my body and the body of my neighbor are only symbols of one mind, separated in and by illusion, and my desire to wake up uniting these two "bodies". My workouts become more effective because I take my body less seriously. My body is simply a reminder that my ego believes I’m separate. So as I work out, I’m engaging my mind through these Interactive Emotional exercises in my desire to rejoin Source. My workouts therefore become a symbol of my desire to become Whole. The body therefore is a tool to communicate the creative will of Source.

B. DREAM ENTRY: 

This was a very personally compelling dream for me - I dreamed I was at a theme park, not so different than Disney World. I was so happy to be there and wanted to remember and savor every moment. When I focused on the details like the characters, architecture, or people I was with, the entire park would disappear. When I focused on the general feeling, and the idea that God is One, all of the theme park reappeared and the joy of being there came back to its fullest capacity. I interpret this as continuing the habit of seeing the world as a projection of my ego. This same phenomena occurs in the waking world. So when I focus on love, or just emulating Jesus or Buddha for just the next ten minutes, then the joy of living here returns with details being vivid. When focusing on the details, or on the illusion, things become jumbled.

C. Today you will do a “Free Association” with each of the emotions explored yesterday. Again, this technique is not intended for you to dwell on the transitory emotions but rather to be able to identify them when you’re going through them in the future. Take whatever time you need between sets and reflect on what each emotion means to you. You can start each sentence with “Anger is…” or “I feel angry when….” or you can describe each emotion in symbols. “I think of racism when I think of anger.” It can be something you hear, “What the f#*k!” Or it can be a feeling, “Anger is a powerful tearing feeling in my throat and heart! Like I want to scream and punch something!” Depending on your personalized workout routine, take 30 seconds to a full minute on each emotion between sets.

***

The Workout
 
Focus on Pulling: Back and Biceps

1. Exercise 1: Standing Barbell Row

__4__ Sets of ___10-12__ Reps

Free Association: “Anger”
  
A strong feeling of displeasure and belligerence aroused by a wrong.
 
(a) I’ve been angry at people for ignoring me.
I’m angry that my car requires $2,000 worth of repairs.
I’m angry that I can’t be paid more for the job I do.
I’ve been angry at the injustices in the theater community.
I’m angry when someone doesn’t acknowledge my hard work.


After Set 2: Continue with “Anger”.

(b) I’m angry that anger causes me to get spiritually stuck.
I’m angry that anger only gets me so far.
I’m angry that my body isn’t as ripped as I’d like it to be.
I’m angry that a great body takes this much effort.
I’m angry that I doubt myself and my intelligence.


After Set 3: “Anger”.

(c) I’m angry that I’m still focusing on anger.
I’m angry that I sometimes see myself as a victim.
I’m angry that it takes this much effort to write a book.
I’m angry that it feels like I’m angry.
I’m angry that I’m losing sight of what’s important.

After Set 4 (or between sets): “Anger”.

(d) I’m angry that I judge others.
I’m angry that I judge myself.
I’m angry that this world doesn’t seem to support peaceful endeavors.
I’m angry that people might judge me as a religious nut or a hippie for writing this kind of material.
I’m angry that I don’t have anything more to be angry about.


2. Exercise 2: Bench Row with Dumbbells

___4___ Sets of __10-12__ Reps

Free Association: “Pride”

A high or inordinate opinion of one’s own dignity, importance, merit, or superiority, whether as cherished in the mind or as displayed in bearing, conduct, etc.

(a) I’m proud that I do communicate with people.
I’m proud that I’ve worked hard enough to have the money to pay for these car repairs.
I’m proud that I’m worth exponentially more than what I’m paid.
I’m proud that I’m a good actor in spite of the political motivations of others.
I’m proud of the fact that I am one of the hardest workers I know when it comes to something I’m passionate about.

After Set 2: Continue with “Pride”.

(b) I’m proud that I’m working with strategies to feel more productive emotions.
I’m proud that I’m using anger and pride effectively right now.
I’m proud that my body is more defined now than it was before I started this 30 day program.
I’m proud that I’m making my best effort today to get the most out of my body.
I’m proud that I have enough intelligence to know this is working because the workouts are getting easier.

After Set 3: “Pride”.

(c) I’m proud of my spiritual persistence.
I’m proud that I truly am doing this every day without compromise.
I’m proud that my vision is clearing.
I’m proud that I’ve been persistent with my Course in Miracles work.
I’m proud of my relationship with Laura.

After Set 4 (or between sets): “Pride”.

(d) I’m proud that I appreciate all the people in my life: past, present, and future.
I’m proud that I’m seeking a deeper connection to reality.
I’m proud that I can be happy in this moment.
I’m proud that this work might be interpreted as wisdom.
I’m proud that I’m ready to experience deeper emotions of pride, like Courage and Trust.


3. Exercise 3: Lat Pull Downs

___4___ Sets of ___10-12__ Reps

Free Association: “Courage”.

The quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, pain, danger, etc. without fear; bravery.

After Set 1: Free Association using “Courage”.

(a) Courage is reaching out to someone, showing appreciation to her, even though we haven’t spoken in a while.
Courage is working on this project in spite of financial hardships.
Courage is looking for ways to increase my income.
Courage is focusing on what I’m doing right.
Courage is actively searching for something to be passionate about.

After Set 2: Continue with “Courage”.

(b) I’m demonstrating courage by working out and journaling about my results.
I’m being courageous by honestly focusing on emotions like guilt, pride, grief and anger.
Courage is showing up at the gym in spite of not being up to the impossible standards I wish I’ve already attained.
Courage is doing this next set even though my body is fatigued.
Courage is momentarily stopping this reflective period and actually doing this next set.

After Set 3: “Courage”.

(c) Courage is making the calls I’ve been procrastinating over.
Courage is intending to emulate my heroes for the next 10 to 30 minutes.
Courage is expressing love when fear is a temptation.
Courage is living it rather than merely talking about it.
Courage is seeing the world through the eyes of love over judgment.

After Set 4 (or between sets): “Courage”.

(d) Courage is honestly looking at fear.
Courage is waking up early.
Courage is seeing the body as an illusion and spirit as reality.
Courage is speaking the truth.
Courage is acknowledging that you can be a vessel in which miracles can be realized.


4. Exercise 4: Bicep Preacher Curls

___3___ Sets of ____12___ Reps

Free Association: “Trust” or “Neutrality”

Trust: Reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing; confidence.

Neutrality: The state of being neutral. Not aligned with or supporting or supporting any side or position of a controversy.

After Set 1: Free Association using “Trust” and/or “Neutrality”.

(a) I trust that others see me as a caring person
I trust that working on this 30 day project is leading to something rewarding.
I trust that I’m not always going to be struggling like this financially.
I trust that my workout quality has improved dramatically.
I trust that I do have a passion for both fitness and writing.

After Set 2: Continue with “Trust” and/or “Neutrality”.

(b) I trust that I’m leading a life of significance just by doing this 30 day Quest.
I trust that emotional awareness is a sign of intelligence.
I trust that every day I get closer to my standards.
I trust that emotions fuel my body.
I trust that my passion will allow my book to be enjoyed by the right readers.

After Set 3: “Trust” and/or “Neutrality”.

(c) I trust that God is.
I trust that “trust” is another word for “faith”.
I trust that my efforts make a difference simply by the way you treat others.
I trust that I’m not even fully aware of the impact and impression you make on others just by being you.
I trust good things are happening as a result of my efforts that I'm not even aware of.

After Set 4 (or between sets): “Trust” and/or “Neutrality”.

(d) I trust people have a part of their mind that is forever connected to Source.
I trust that "part" of awareness can grow to awareness "in full".
I trust that I’m fully committed to my own awakening.
I trust that I have a better chance of reaching my goals than if I wasn’t doing this 30 day Quest.
I trust nothing in my life was in vain and all efforts contribute to this Quest today on unconscious levels.
I trust that I am loved.


5. Exercise 5: Barbell Curls

___3__ Sets of ___10-12__ Reps

Free Association: “Willingness” or “Determination”

Willingness: Disposed or consenting; inclined. Done, given, bourn, used, etc. Cheerful readiness.

Determination: The act of coming to a decision or of fixing or settling a purpose.

After Set 1: Free Association using “Willingness” or “Determination”.

(a) I am willing to communicate today with the friendliest and warmest of intentions.
I am determined to finish out this set.
I am willing to let go of my mental anguish over finances just for today.
I am determined to acknowledge the quality of everything I’m doing.
I am willing to journal about this when I’m done my workout.

After Set 2: Continue with “Willingness” or “Determination”.

(b) I am determined in this moment.
I am willing to be honest about how I am feeling when writing about this.
I am willing to reevaluate my standards.
I am determined to become aware of my emotions.
I am determined to find greater depths of passion, even when I’m not “feeling it”.

After Set 3: “Willingness” or “Determination”.

(c) I’m determined to finish this 30 day Quest.
I’m determined to finish the entire year’s worth of A Course in Miracles workbook.
I’m determined to emulate my heroes (Jesus and Buddha) for at least the next 30 minutes.
I’m determined to see my brother as an equal in spiritual awareness and miracle making.
I’m determined to see the world through the eyes of wisdom as opposed to fear.

After Set 4 (or between sets): “Willingness” or “Determination”.

(d) I’m willing to be conscious of my spiritual intentions every half hour.
I’m willing to read books that inspire me in every moment that I can spare.
I’m willing to appreciate my health and good feelings.
I’m willing to acknowledge how affective his work is personally for me.
I’m willing to let go of the desire for anything I write to be accepted by others.


6. Exercise 6: Dumbbell Bicep Curls

___3___ Sets of ____12_____ Reps

Free Association: “Acceptance” or “Forgiveness”.

Definition of “Acceptance”:

The act of taking or receiving something offered. The act of assenting or believing.

Definition of “Forgiveness”:

Act of forgiving. To grant pardon for or remission of (an offense; debt); absolve. To give up all claim on account of; remit. To cancel indebtedness or liability of.

After Set 1: Free Association using “Acceptance” and/or “Forgiveness”.

(a) I forgive my weak moments when I spoke in anger or frustration.
I accept my body’s limitations.
I forgive my choices to become an artist and accept that I’m different from what the status quo expects me to be.
I accept that I’ve never been this motivated before.
I forgive my previous ignorance and not knowing myself as much as was necessary to write a book like this.

After Set 2: Continue with “Acceptance” and/or “Forgiveness”.

(b) I accept that the only thing I control is what I choose to focus on right now.
I forgive my lack of understanding, from not having the vision to see what someone else wants in their deepest heart of hearts.
I accept my body and soul for the perfection that it is -- therefore I accept that to do this properly is to see the same in another.
I forgive myself for not giving myself care, concern and relaxation when I needed it the most.
I accept that this book is what it is and will be what it will be.

After Set 3: “Acceptance” and/or “Forgiveness”.

(c) Forgiveness has deeper meaning for me.
Forgiveness is acknowledging that we are all One.
Forgiveness is seeing past the illusion of separation.
Forgiveness is letting go of my identity as a body and my brother’s identity as a body.
Forgiveness is a release of fear and guilt that is really self-judgment projected onto someone or something else.

After Set 4 (or between sets): “Acceptance” and/or “Forgiveness”.

(d) I accept that I’m right where I need to be.
I accept that this is a very vivid memory and that I’m really where I belong - with and as Source.
I accept that not everyone will embrace these ideas with open arms.
I accept that all these words are my truth.
I accept there only ever is one choice - that between Fear and Love.


DIET JOURNAL: (log in any foods you consumed for the day)

Egg, Multi-Grain Bread
Protein Shake
Protein Shake
Peanut Butter and Jelly
Pork
Black and Pinto Beans


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